Noise in the Attic: The Trap is Set

Day one of Trap Watch. The trap is empty…my attic is not. Though there is the possibility that the raccoon overheard Joe and I talking on Monday, packed up his things, and moved on. (Sorry, neighbors). There is also the possibility that he stored up some food, invited over some friends and is planning to trash the place like 90’s rock stars in a final act of rebellion.

I have already warned the children that anything stored in the attic may never be seen again. I had planned on getting down spring clothes hand-me-down boxes but have decided the kids can just roll up sleeves and pant legs…they will survive! You don’t need clothes for every season…I mean, who are we, the Kardashians?

The trap is set.

In the meantime, I’m not sure how to feel. My research shows that Raccoon babies are typically born in April/May. With approximately a 60 day gestation period it’s also possible that my innocent attic was used like a by-the-hour roadside motel. It feels inappropriate. This is a family home for goodness sake!

So now we wait. But I want you to notice the distance from the trap to my bedroom window…the true horror of this is that if the trap releases and comes up victorious it is entirely possible that it will fall from it’s perch and dangle. Across my bedroom window. I will be huddled in a corner repeating “it’s just a Davy Crockett hat” until Joe arrives.

As we wait, for those of you who are concerned about the welfare of the visiting bandit, I want you to know that Joe is a professional and will take care of the situation in the most humane way possible in accordance with North Carolina law. This is purely driven by safety and health for our home. I would never trap a raccoon in the wild. Although according to one of the men working on our kitchen remodel, they are delicious.

Part 3: I Was Not Prepared